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The Rage
In The Kage X:
McHappy Holidays
Written by: Kage
Alan
Seasons Greetings everyone! Now, quick…go out
and buy my book! Just kidding. No, I’m not, but you can pretend I
am. Would you believe it’ll make a terrific Christmas gift?
Really, it does. In fact, buy 2. The thing is that you know you’ve
made it as an author when you finally get a sales ranking on
Amazon.com. Sure, I may only have the 1,500,000th most
popular item on the site, but it’s a start. That number has
decreased to 1,200,000 or thereabouts, so somebody is buying the
bloody thing. At the rate I’m going, that $0.25 I’m making on each
book sold will be able to pay for one month of my cell phone bill
next year when I receive my first royalty check. Ha! And people
think it’s all glamour…
As for glamour in other realms, has anybody
checked out the latest Sarah Brightman CD, “Harem”? It’s very
different from her previous albums, but just as lush and gorgeous
sounding. The woman has the voice of an angel. Fortunately for
those of us stuck back down here on planet I-can’t-sing Earth, Sarah
is touring North America right now and will be visiting the Detroit
area next February as well as many others during the next several
months. For information about her tour as well as any promotional
appearances, be sure to check out her official website at
www.Sarah-Brightman.com. I’m hoping to get a CD review of the
album on here in a week or two as well.
Due to an overwhelming number of DVDs that I
have to review, I haven’t had as much time to devote to the music
section. However, there is a new review up for longtime Australian
favorite Real Life as well as another new artist, both of who I urge
you to take a listen to. ISL Public Relations recently passed along
a CD to me of a band named Prospect Place. Since there are only 4
songs on the disc, I couldn’t really make a regular length review
out of it, so let me just say a few words about them here. Lead
singer/songwriter Yotty and guitar/vocalist Rev originally hail from
Israel, but decided to pursue their musical ambitions in NYC, which
makes sense. Without getting ridiculous in comparing them to other
groups or artists out there (we all do it, though), Prospect Place
manages to cross a number of genres, going anywhere from a classic
rock appeal to something much more modern, yet tinged with their own
voice that makes them unique. Best of all, the vocals are strong,
the music compliments them and the songs are downright catchy. This
will definitely be a group I check out in the future when their
first full release comes out. If you’d like to check them out, they
have a website at
www.ProspectPlaceBand.com or their publicist can be reached at
ISLPR@aol.com.
A new interview was recently posted on Moda
with “Babylon 5” alumni Patricia Tallman. If you aren’t familiar
with her, not only is she an extraordinary actress and stuntwoman,
but she also does charity work for Penny Lane, an organization
dedicated to helping kids who have been deemed “unable to be placed”
in the regular foster care system. Please check it out and don’t
forget to take a look at either Pat’s site or Penny Lane’s site,
especially during the upcoming holiday season. You can make a
difference in a child’s life. You can also make a difference in
mine. See the first paragraph of this column. Hey, at least I’m
being honest!
Speaking of jobs in Hollywood (just in case you
missed it, that was my transition), has anybody heard of McDonald’s
being upset at Webster’s for including the word “McJob” in their
latest batch of dictionary additions? Apparently the definition has
something to do with a “dead end job” and McDonald’s is upset. I’ll
tell you what. If I was a McDonald’s worker outside of the US, I’d
be offended. Ever been to a McDonald’s in Japan or Hong Kong? I
have. They treat them like real jobs. While there are a few decent
workers who give a damn in the US, let’s face it; these people
aren’t paid enough to care and they’re also probably the very same
people who gave Webster’s the idea. Get over it, McDonald’s, and
take the hint. When the dictionary gives you a bad name, is it you
or the rest of the world? Who wants to bet they’ll respond “The
rest of the world”? As an added bonus, anybody who’s read “Fast
Food Nation” by Eric Schlosser will know damn well that McDonald’s
poor reputation has been earned with great precision.
Is everybody ready for the upcoming holiday
season? I am, especially since I’ve waited several years for the
studios to release a better version of “A Christmas Story” and
“National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation” and they finally did!
Remember, I’m a self-admitted Widescreen DVD snob. Not only did we
get the Widescreen transfers we’ve deserved and demanded, but
they’ve give us EXTRAS! Believe me, if the Traci Lords B-movie
collection can make its way out onto DVD, then they can damn well
give us better versions of those Christmas films. And speaking of
Traci Lords, I read her autobiography. Yes, even gay guys get
curious about you straight folks from time to time. Besides, it was
also the day the power went out on the east coast and I didn’t have
my portable DVD player battery recharged, so it was either dusting
or Traci Lords. How sad is my life that I chose the book? Okay,
admittedly parts of the book were pretty informative, but the
overall project left far too many loose ends and gaping holes,
absolutely no pun intended.
Moving along to gaping holes in the fabric of
time and space, great news out there for all of you fans of “The
Final Countdown”! Blue-Underground has the rights to the movie and
will be releasing a much improved DVD version of the classic/cult
(?) film sometime next year. I reviewed Pacific Family
Entertainment’s version a year or two ago and found it to be a total
piece of crap. Not only do some players have a difficult time
reading the disc, but the quality is garbage and the extras we were
originally so excited to have included were yanked with no
explanation. PFE contacted me when they saw the review and
threatened legal action if we didn’t remove it from the site, which
we didn’t end up doing. If you’re going to put out a crap product,
deal with the fact somebody is going to point it out to you and be
less than favorable. I think you’ll know what I mean when I say
that corresponding with that company had me muttering about what an
entirely different kind of “hole” they were.
So, reporting to you from somewhere in the air
between Sacramento and San Diego and wishing you all a safe and
happy holiday season…
Sincerely yours,
The DVD Snob
Previous
installments:
Vol. 1 - Critic Kage Alan rants about dvds and Warner
Bros.
Vol. 2 - Railing on Region Coding
Vol. 3 - Widescreen Vs.
Pan And Scan
Vol. 4 -
Artisan, PFE and Conventions...Oh, My!
Vol. 5
- DVD Special Features
Vol. 6 - The Horror
of It All
Vol.
7 - From The Inside Out
Vol. 8 - Budgets &
Quality Control
Vol. 9 - Further Tales From The Motor City
Kage holds
degrees in Creative Writing, as well as Film & Video. He has
been featured in a Life Journey Tele-Course, published poems in
several national anthologies, been a contributor to The Third Coast
Magazine and written several novels. mailto:kage@modamag.com
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