Movie Review | Bad Boys II
Reviewed by: Brian Orndorf

1995 was along time ago, and “Bad Boys” was a small time, out-of-nowhere hit in the spring of that year. It helped launch the careers of Martin Lawrence and Will Smith, and gave birth to its notorious director, Michael Bay. Now, 8 years later, everyone in the production has gone on to blockbuster status, and they regard this long promised sequel as a return to the “fun” movies they all used to make. So duck and cover, because here comes “Bad Boys II,” and now all the stars have a license to do whatever they want.

Marcus Burnett (Martin Lawrence) and Mike Lowrey (Will Smith) still protect the streets of Miami, but now they’ve stumbled onto a ring of Cuban drug dealers smuggling high-potency Ecstasy into the local clubs. Lead by the drug lord Johnny Tapia (Jordi Molla, pathetically rehashing his role in the infinitely better film, “Blow”), the crimewave uses cadavers to smuggle the drugs, involving an undercover DEA agent, Sydney Burnett (Gabrielle Union, “Deliver Us >From Eva”), who also happens to be Marcus’s sister. As the “Bad Boys” trash the city streets, monorail system, and various homes trying to locate his whereabouts, Tapia is in the process of taking his money and fleeing the country, using Sydney as insurance for his escape.

The beauty of the first “Bad Boys” was that nobody in the production had any power. Even producer Jerry Bruckheimer was in the middle of a slump. “Boys I” was treated with kid gloves, and Michael Bay didn’t get all the extravagances he wanted for the final product. In fact, he had to chip in his own money to get one of the shots used in the first film! These limitations kept “Boys I” from being crushed by its own excesses. Sure, the film was an absurdly over-the-top action fest, cruelly foreshadowing the visual heartbreak Bay would later master, but it was a pure and inoffensive experience. It was hilarious too, using the unique chemistry that Smith and Lawrence shared to counterbalance the often hysterically overblown visuals.

In 2003, Bay has total control over every aspect of his productions after banging out a streak of inexplicably hit films. With “Armageddon” and “Pearl Harbor,” Bay delivered on the obnoxious visual style that was only hinted at in “Boys I,” made all the worse by his insistence that these films be taken with deadly sincerity. “Boys II” represents lighter fare from Bay, using his lead foot directorial style in the pursuit of good old American movie summer fun. Even though it’s amped up to a pornographic degree, “Boys II” has many scenes that reminds the viewer why the first film worked. The picture isn’t quite wall-to-wall action, taking ample time off to bathe again in the Smith/Lawrence interplay (warmly recreated here), even building on some of the plot threads presented in the first film. One of the classic new scenes involves Marcus and Mike berating a gentleman suitor who has come to collect Marcus’s daughter for a date. This scene brought tears to my eyes with laughter, and for a split second convinced me that Bay could be capable of so much more than mass destruction.

I was snapped quickly out of that fog.

“Boys II” doesn’t bother to tease the action sequences, choosing instead to dive right into three car chases and endless gunfire that is supposed to represent conflict. Loaded to bear with money and not a single person able to tell him no, Bay goes berserk staging action sequences that resemble nothing more than flaming nonsense. It’s not that Bay gets carried away with his balls of fire or torn up city streets, but more that he shoots them with such poisonous attention to chaos, that it’s impossible to enjoy anything. He shakes his camera violently, edits around logic like a madman, and even recycles his annoying “The Rock” camera move by constantly zooming in and out on the principals during the car chases to simulate action pandemonium. Bay has billions in box office to back his style up, but does that make it right? Bay’s soul-flattening mise en scene drains the entertainment right out of “Boys II,” and creates this bizarro action movie world where the scenes of character and story development are more compelling than the gargantuan stunts and special effect set pieces. It’s tough to watch “Boys II” spend tens of millions wrecking Florida highways, when simple scenes of domestic comedy are the moments the audience remembers most. But that’s the way Bay’s been operating for years. It’s quite sad.

It should be noted that “Bad Boys II” runs 147 minutes. Yes, you read that correctly. There is nothing, nada, zip in this movie that requires 2 ½ hours of time. The original movie barely made it to two hours before it sputtered to a resolution, and the sequel begs even more time to run through its maze of Bay mayhem. Yet another example of the Bay indulgence that should’ve been rethought.

For the grand finale, Bay ups the ante even further by taking the action to Cuba, and staging his third (yipes!) car chase of the film, this time through a cocaine-producing shantytown (because this will allow for more fireballs). By this time the picture is running on fumes, and staggering to the finish line. Bay attempts to offset fatigue by going bonkers with explosions and gunfights for the final act, but this ploy is all too transparent, and the urge to leave the theater becomes overwhelming. I enjoyed “Bad Boys II” much more than I thought I would, but I hardly condone its actions. Even as a summer popcorn flick, the action goes much too far. Goodness, if this is the best Michael Bay can do in “fun” mode these days, I loathe to hear what “serious” project comes next from the director.

Grade: 4/10